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English Class..
Kid: Me Sleep With Dad Last Night
Madam Corrected: No Beta, I Slept With Dad Last Night
Kid: Aap Mere Sone Ke Baad Aayi Hongi..
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Teacher :- Ek taraf Paisa aur ek taraf DIMAAG, Kya loge tum?
Student :- Paisa Lunga..
Teacher :- Galat, Main hoti toh Dimaag leti..
Student :- Jiske paas jo nahi woh wohi lega na..!
Bata "pata" mujhe 1 bhai or chahiye aaj or avi" Papa: "bata aise kam me to 9mahine lagte hai"Bata: "Aap to thikedar ho 5-7 admi or laga do jaldi kam ho jayega:-P
voh chumle 1 baar to aati nahi nind.
unki mithi aavaz se raat jaati he beet.
Isiliye kehta hu yaarpo ye rishk na uthaoo .
kachuaa jalaoo machchar bhagaoo.
Tin tin tring
Gappu:When I was born they fired a 21-gun salute.
Pappu:Too bad they missed.
Q.what is the thinnest book in the world ?
what men know about women.
Q:what is the diffrence between awife and a girlfriend?
A:About 45 pound!!
Q:what is the diffrence between a wife and a magnet?
A:Magnets have a positive side !
Q.How do you define the marriage ?
A.A very expensive way to get the laundary done.
Q.Why did santa put his finger over the nail when he was hammering?
A.The noise gave him a headache.
Why couldn't the sailors play cards?
Because the captain was standing on the deck!
Reporter:How does it fell to become a millionaire?
Millionaire:sad,because I am not a billionare.
Can I go to the theatre ? Asks a mosquito to her mother.
Yes, but be aware,pay attention during the applause.
Q.why doesn't law permit a man to marry a second woman?
A.Bcause as per law u cannot be punished twice for the same offence!
Soldier:Sir, we are surrounded!
Major:Excellent!We can attack in any direction now!
Wife: Why are you home so early?
Husband: My boss told me to go to hell.
Boss in government department:Why din't you take the leave due to you this year? Civil servent: I needed the rest.
Man:Whisper those three words that will make me walk on air.
Woman:Go hang yourself.
Q:What is the diffrence between a jeweller and jailor?
A:A jeweller sells wathches whereas a jailor wathches cells!!!
Q: How did santa cheat the railways?
A: He bought the ticket and didn't travel.
Teachaer:Sonu,your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's.Did u copy his ? Student:No,teacher,it's the same dog.
Q: Why did santa fall out the window?
A: He was ironing the curtain.
Q:Why do men chase women while they have no intention of marrying?
A:For the same reason dogs chase cars,they have no intention of driving.
Q: What is a difference between a lawyer and a vampire?
A: Vampire only sucks blood at night.
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